August of 2009.....Social Services had FINALLY dropped their investigation on me. They started it in July of 2008, and I believe it was in July or August of 2009 that they dropped it. And why? Because I am a GREAT mother and I have never hurt nor would I ever hurt my son.
My biological father who lives in NY was going to come visit me.....this is after me asking him multiple times to come visit me, and each time he told me "No". My sister who lives in TN was going to fly in at the same time as him. They were going to come at the end of August.
Well, in August, I learned that since Social Services dropped their case on me, my divorce got dropped as well. If you've been following my blog from the beginning, you may remember that the Magistrate rolled up my divorce along with the case with Social Services.
I was absolutely HORRIFIED to learn that my divorce was dropped! And now, me ex could legally take my son to Florida with him. I had to act, and fast! Fortunately, I don't even thing my ex realized that the divorce case got dropped, and that he could legally take my son to Florida.
I ended up telling my biological father and my sister, that their trip had to be rescheduled. I apologized, and told each of them, that it was a very bad time for me, and it truly was. They blew up. They wouldn't take "no" for an anwer. I even offered to pay for any penalties, but that didn't help, nor did it change anything. They told me that they were coming anyway....TOLD ME....like I was a child. Neither one of them respected my wishes or feelings at all. That was it. I had enough. Enough of my biological constantly screaming at me like I was and am a child...and my sister was not much better. No, she didn't scream at me like he did, but she was just like him, and she could do no wrong in his eyes.
It was after each of them told me that they were coming anyway despite what I said, that I got fed up, and left my apartment for the 4 days or so that they were going to come and visit. I stayed at a hotel. I had enough stress going on....I didn't need them to add to it, and I didn't want them showing up at my door. I asked them nicely to please reschedule....but it didn't matter how nice I asked them....neither one of them respected me for the adult that I am.
It was at the end of August, that I received a message from my father via FaceBook. He told me that my mother was very ill. As I would soon learn, she had/has stage 4 liver disease. I hadn't talked to my mother for years, and I was still mad at her, but I at least wanted to send her a message. And so I did. I believe I emailed her. I told her something along the lines of, that I was sorry to hear about her health condition, and that I loved her, and that I would pray for her.
My mom and I started talking. I was very skeptical because of how abusive she always was to me in the past. Low and behold, my mother had changed! She was no longer abusing prescription drugs. She wasn't the controlling person that she always was to me. I got my mother back! The mother that I once had, but lost for a long time. I told her that I had a son, and we started filling eachother in on our lives.
This was still a horrible time in my life. My ex could still legally take my son to Florida. My mother offered to hire me an attorney, and I took her up on her offer, and I had my attorney file a new divorce. My biological father and my mother were, and are, like day and night.
My mother was horrified to hear what I have been through. She knew I was going through a horrible time, and how scared I was. After she already booked her flight to come to see me, she offered to reschedule her trip, if it would be easier on me. She didn't scream...she wasn't angry...she simply offered. She even said, "that's what cancellation insurance is for". Wow. What a difference between her and my biological father and sister.
I told her not to re-schedule her trip, and that I wanted her to come. She did. Our reunion was a bit emotional. I was holding my precious baby boy, and I answered my door holding him.
So now, my ex could no longer legally take my son out of Colorado. That gave me a peace of mind.
It was nice to see my mother...and to see how she had changed over the years. I was very proud of her!
She visited for about 4 days or so, before she flew back to where she lives.
October came....I was working 2 jobs. One of them was the part-time job that I worked at while I was married to my ex. The other job was part-time as well, but I was doing the best that I could do. Then my ex turned around and told me that he was moving back to Florida.
My ex indicated that there was nothing for him in Colorado. Nothing for him? He is a father! In my opinion, a great parent puts their child FIRST. I mean, I was willing to stay at a shelter just so that I could see my son, even if only for once or twice a week. How he could just quit his job and move 2 time zones away from his son, I will never be able to understand. He went home to live with his mother....and no, he had no job waiting for him there. He just wanted to be near "his family"....forget his own son....he wanted to back to live with his mother. That disgusts me.
Prior to him moving, my attorney drew up temporary legal paperwork (while waiting for the permanent hearing and paperwork to be drawn up). It indicated that I was, and that I am, the legal, sole, residential custodian/guardian of my son. My ex signed the paper work, as did I...my attorney sent it to the court, and the Judge granted it.
I was FINALLY, my son's legal, sole, residential, custodian/guardian! I couldn't be happier!
